::
these are things that have made me laugh, made me cringe, made
me stop and think....maybe they're not for you...but take what you can,
laugh a bit, and share what you like.
This is my original quotes page...so these quotes are highly revered and
respected...
by me, anyway ;)
- enjoy! -- Ian
Your money says in God we trust, but it's against the law to pray in school. You say we beat the Russians to the moon and I say you starved your children to do it. You say all men are equal, all men are brothers. Then why are the rich more equal than others? Don't ask me for the answers I've only got one, that a man leaves his darkness when he follows the Son.
- Closing lyrics to a song by Larry Norman. Got it from Jim's Page and David.Kermott@mci.com
Yesterday has been spent, and you don't own tomorrow...live for Jesus today!
Weather or not you enjoy what your doing depends on if you'd rather be doing anything else.
Life is short. Watch TV.
A Bus in Macon, Georgia.
Someday my ship will come in....but I'll be at the airport.
GoTee in #Teens4Jesus on irc.dal.net
To err is human.... To really screw up, you need a computer...
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back it's yours. If it doesn't, it never really was in the first place."
- Mandi's tagline
"There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those you can count, and those who can't."
"It's better to regret something you've done, rather than something you haven't done."
"If you always do what you've always done, then you'll always get what you've always got."
"Love seeks the highest good of others regardless of their behavior." -- Quin Sherrer
"Great thoughts go best with common duties. Whatever therefore may be your office regard it as a fragment in an immeasurable ministry of love." -- Bishop Brooke Foss Westcott b. 1825
"Do not speak of what you know; instead speak of that which you do not know so that your subconscious mind will hear an idiot speaking and correct the problem." -- Chris Ilias
- Submitted by Angelica (Jelikers@aol.com)
"Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today." -- James Dean
"There are some people who look at Barney and wonder, where's an asteroid when you need one?"
"People say I must be a horrible person. That's not true. I have the heart of a young boy--in a jar on my desk"--Stephen King
...evil will always win, because good is dumb! -Spaceballs
- mystery (mysterychic007@hotmail.com)
Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, today is a gift, that's why it's called the present.
- BD (derico@rose.net)
The best thing about not employing forward planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise instead of being proceeded by weeks of worry and depression.
- Submitted by Cisef
*silence*.......*pow*.. *AHHHH!!!!!*
(listen to sound clip [64k .wav])
-Chris Rushing digging in my storage room
we get stressed out because we are not allowing God to be as big as He really is
it's difficult to strangle yourself with a cordless phone
-Tim Moran
"he who dies with the most toys still dies....and then he has to explain where he got the toys.."
"no lettuce is better then wilted lettuce" (muttered durning lunch at burger king)
"if you're guna stare, wave."
"Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something"
-Princess Bride
"save a cow—eat a vegetarian"
"with the force there is no try, only chicken grease"
"there will be serious consequences for those who eat my ketchup"
"strangers have the best candy"
"chevys are heaviers than boys, one should keep this in mind"
"practice caution around jello molds"
"don't clean the table without clearing the Turkey"
"never put yeast in your cranberry sauce"
"the Lord is my shepherd, that's all I want"
"we tune because we love you"
-the band Klaymen
"yea though i careen down steep mountains at 40 miles per hour with no idea what's beyond the next switchback, i shall fear no evil because at 11,000 feet there isn't enough oxygen for my brain to understand fear anyway."
"why slow down, when you can make wide turns?"
-Ian
I'm glad I'm stupid.
Cooties are real.
"reality is the hardest thing to be faced with"
"Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose."
The reason most people fail instead of succeed is that they trade what they want most for what they want at the moment.
- cited in the Best of Bits & Pieces
"pennies annoy me"
-Paul Ebert
"I don't need to find a theocracy that will take me, I already belong to one! Next to find a democracy God will take."
-closing thought from a post by Noah on the TeenPact Discussion Board
"don't get so busy doing stuff for God that you forget to do stuff with God"
-vallie s.
Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you know they are always there
-Keri's AIM 'away' message
"no expectations are the best expectations"
"...manual, forced, child labor....in the name of science.....or something.."
-ian, fish, and cody,
while loading the portable stage after WakeUp weekend
"..i put the band-aid on the wrong finger.."
-kyle tyson
"..I'm scared of ICQ.."
"..fuel injectors scare me...I don't know what they do..."
"people are redundant"
'Mack' from Third Day: "hey guys, whatsup" (to Cody, Joe, Chris, & Ian)
*introductions by Joel, handshakes*
Mack to Guys: "whoa...you guys have a bunch of radios.."
Guys: "..yea, this way we can't get lost...we even use them in WalMart.."
Mack to Joel: "Where'd you get these guys??"
"naked people have very little influence in society"
-Josh Freeman
"In God We Trust. All others, we monitor."
-from a scanner enthusiast's webpage, and Chris Hall's and my personal motto
"I hate the country club, it scares me...lots of rich, drunk people there, and they all think you're the janitor"
-chall
"the grass is greener where you water it"
-Pastor Steve
"I'm a genious, that's all you need to know"
-chall
"Have your cow and be done with it!"
-Daphne Johnson
"Life's sucked lately, but I got over it."
-Josiah Jones
"Surrounded by a world of stereo, yet incased in a wall of mono" -JRC
"It looks like what it is, but it isn't."
-someone selling carpet to John
"where's the super, where's the super?" [pause]
"(I'm trying to direct TV from my house)" -chris to ian on the
radio
"do you have to have any special equipment to do that?" -Ian
"no, I just yell at the TV really loud and it works" -chris
"you know, I would get married right now, just so I wouldn't have to do dishes anymore"
-chall
if God didn't want us to eat meat, then why'd he make cows out of it? -chall
"you know better then that!" -JRC
"what??" -chall
"pagin' me while I'm naked!!" -JRC
"girls like jerks"
"two girls & a hubcap, what's that?" -shannon piland
"to the extent that the law of man interferes with the law of God, it isn't just" -Patrick Poff
"you could swollow a pack of band-aids, but it still wouldn't heal your soul!" -Josh Freeman
"dang, if I'd have known doughnuts were involved, I would have tried" -Mark Wilkes, after declining to answer a problem in electronic class...
"mice don't grow in shoes, mice grow in mice" -chall
"in a world of black and white, John still wears tie-dye" -william sutton
"black people don't eat beaver" -ricky hardy
"there's three things I'll never understand: chicks, jones, and computers" -chall
"save a tree; eat a beaver" - tim helms
"When you're talking to someone in the hallway at school, and they say, "I'll see you later," how do they know that you wern't planning on stalking them?" -tim helms
"fat people are harder to kidnap" -vince frosteg
"sleep....sleep? broadcasters don't sleep!" -mike brown
"you're never on my side!" -peyton to joel
"that's because you're the bad guy!" -ian
"don't be a poet, be a tv repairman" -the old poet on My Girl 2
"the question is not who they are, rather, who they are talking to. " -iff
"Back in my day we welded with a battery, jumpercables, and a nickle. The mics were all omni, highs were all piezo, and a sub was what you ate if ya run the six channels good!"
-pro sound magazine (via chall)
"I don't define reality, I only live in it. sometimes. " -iff
"If I run away, I'm either going to the mountains, or to the beach. or maybe to California." -iff
"if you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there" -George Harrison
I think that desire and the internet can accomplish anything. -Lucas Shearer
Luxury is relative. -iff
"it's good to have options; whether or not you use them is irrelevant" -Ben Nelson
"if sour dough bread is sour, does it get moldy?" -Joe Gordon
"sometimes, I go to parties in my head...but sometimes the neighbors complain that the music is too loud, in my head. So I try to turn it down...but I can't, because there are no knobs up there. -Space Ghost
"money doesn't make the world go 'round, but it will help you go 'round the world." -Josh Freeman
"pork fat rules" -Emirral Lagassee
"women sap wisdom" -Lucas Shearer
"I don't like weddings. I like funerals better: you only lose one friend at a time." -a friend of Josh Freeman
"all sharks are good deep down" -caroline pope
"I'd rather have friendship than money" -chall
"I don't take intelligence drugs, because I don't know what they are. but I will put anything into my mouth, even if it doesn't belong there. because I'm different."
"Just because I'm famous and sexy doesn't mean anybody can go and merry me the second I leave the room"
-Space Ghost
"I was not put on earth to listen to meat" -shake from Aqua teen hunger force
Life is Weird...but I like it. -AnA
"I hate it when people make me out to be sensual, just because I'm attractive." -shep
Girl to Kari: "I love my Gecko"
Kari to Girl: "Girl, that Gecko's gonna get you in trouble"
"relax, it's just an artichoke" -emerall lagasse
"I don't ask questions, I just get on the bus" -ian
I learn more about me, more about the people around me, and more about life every day. -iff
"you're guna have a salad from waffel house? do they put grease in that, too?" -John Cable to Ana
"If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people around?" -Alan Slaughter
every repair is an oportunity to buy new tools. -cartalk
without fantasy, all you have is reality. and reality bites. -Shannon Piland
if you can get lucky by throwing pennys into water fountains, think you can get lucky by throwing pennys into flushing toliets? -Ian
"there's always a party at biglots" -chall
"we get our jollies one way or another" -mike brown
"I know I'm lame, I can't help it" -Doug Oade
"what you love, you'll be willing to fail at" -Josh Freeman
trucks are like women, they never do what they're supposted too. -jared vickers
gone crazy - back soon -bumper sticker
if I can pull your pants down, I might do it! -Josh Freeman (talking to the youth group)
Banannas are for monkies and people who can't hold apples. -Jones.com
"he didn't share - I stole" -chall
remember, you don't have to run faster then the alligator, you just have to outrun the guy next to you - Jake Parrott
"it's just like...swollowing sea water! -except that you don't puke" -K2 on Eating Oysters
"I'm really creative. Sometimes I wear an eyepatch because I'm so creative" -Space Ghost
I usually don't recognize people by their butt cheeks. -Caitlin Shearer
"If Big Lots ain't got it, then I don't need it" -Keelan's Grandfather
"I have but one fish...but I have two!" -Dustin Maeno
"when tom parrish leaves, the coffee leaves with him" -Steven Hardy
"I have a unique way of using everything" -Kari Bresett
"Life is short - there is no time for hatred" -wife of pilot of flight 93 that crashed in Shanksville, PA on 9/11/01
"Birds are weird man..they're like lizards....with feathers" -DBN
"avoid tounge papercuts - pay bills online" -billboard in Dallas
"guys shouldn't be cheerleaders" -John Cook
"rain makes everything more fun" -ian
"life is like walking through a mine-field with your eyes closed"
"if you take Jesus out of the picture, there is no picture"
"people who go on mass killing sprees need deliverance"
-josh freeman
"all a gun is is a really fast knife" -joe gordon
"I may not always answer your call. but I'm always on time"
"I hate people that make lucky shots all the time"
-josh folsom
"give the ball to Edgar - that's all you need to remember" -Paul Ebert
"if the convention is wrong, change the convention" -Ian
"Matt Carvin is normal" -Sarah Waters
"but he's not a good guy" -John Cook
"Give him his oreos back!" -Emerill
"if you have a choice between regular heaven and pie heaven, choose pie heaven. because, think - even if it doesn't exist: mmmmmmm, pie!" -Dustin Mano
"if a turtle's on top of a post, someone put him there" -josh folsom
I'm in the car - I can't go anywhere but where the car takes me. -chall
"you can't shame me into patience" -FHF
all I'm saying is, if you didn't tell me, don't ask me to repeat what you said. because you didn't. -Rob Sipsky
"TV isn't bad - it's when it's plugged in that it's bad" -josh freeman
"Anarcists are dumb"
"sin's like a buffet, that you don't have to pay for. until after you've eaten"
-Josh Freeman
"to love a woman is like hitting your finger with a hammer. At first you at hate it, but then it's not so bad" -Space Ghost
a conglomeration of stuff, stuft in a thing. that's a hotdog. -ben nelson
"The most wonderful thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from" -Mackie CR1604-VLZ manual, page 67
"if you're guna take vitamins, don't mess around about it" -Warren Becker
"I'm an unconventional college president in a vast multiplicity of ways" -mark rutland
Depth perception is kinda weird at 70 MPH. -ian
"Democrats are stupid" -Ron Crews
"Oh, I'll never be one [a muslim]. I'll eat my ham." -girl from Psych class
"God knows what you're thinking - you might as well tell Him" -randy from CFNI
"the tuner speaks. I'm simply a messenger."
"this world was meant to be a wal-mart parking lot" -john moss
"that's why I like fish - they don't poop on the carpet" -Josh Freeman
"put katsup on it, and I'll eat it" -Pastor Barry
that's where what you need always is - the one place you didn't look. -cook
I hate sleep. you waste so much time sleeping. -ana
"Loyalty has no place in science" -cartalk
I don't get lost - I have maplights! -Alan
"everything about jessica stanton is really loud" -Dustin Mayno
Power is Implied. -John Moss
"ninth grade girls will date anything that walks" -Pam Stensel
"They must understand what you say in the time it takes you to say it" -my speech book, pg. 352
"just because we CAN make it digital doesn't mean we NEED to" -parsons
"see, as long as you don't play bad notes in-between the good notes, no one knows you're messing up.." -ian
"all we need is about 4-million dollars to make me happy" -DTO
"once bread becomes toast it can never go back" -blake
"just because people do something for a living, doesn't mean they're professionals" -ron with the blue truck
"I like waitresses. because they usually have less of a life then we do." -parsons
everybody's mother likes John Cook -kealon
sleeping is so boring -caroline
"stop clapping" -calen
"I don't remember when my birthday is. I just woke up one day, and my parents said 'hey, you're 18'" -Timmah
"you can't drive two and get anywhere" -chall
"being mean won't get you anywhere in life except for democrat" -ian
"My schedule changes hourly... "
You can't just go around making up the news...or math... -chall
"you shouldn't kick your computer" -JrC
see, the water still floats to the top. it doesn't matter where the top is, as long as you don't get your oil from there. -iff
"ahhhh shoe!" -billboard in Dothan
"CiCi's rocks, man." -Shawn Fletcher
"it's 10 degrees hotter in Alabama then it is anywhere else" -chall
"all seniors come from Flordia" -patrick
tim: what are you playing? that's my song!
patrick: no it's not! I wrote it way before you did!
if lint would stay in your clothes, your clothes would last forever. -parsons
"I hate pretty people" -Ashli Cauley
"if you take five lefts, you end up in metcalf, no matter where you start" -jeri
I don't like to get on stuff that's "just leanin' "-bill benton
my life's not long enough for QRP -nirmal
"ice floats, and it's making me nervous" -Avery Buckman
poop is not a vegetable -Phil Aiuto
people are not made to get up before the sunshine -ana
I wouldn't know what to do with 1 pound of Velveta, much less two -cook
oh, no. we'll not play soccer in the gym. -Mark Rutland
Girls are nothing more than a distraction that keeps men from enjoying all the cool toys other men have invented. -chuck ellis
No, you don't know hot on the way to Texas. let me tell you about hot on the way to Texas. it's like, 120°. -Jeremy Parrott
Love messes you up. it makes you broke.
-my friend Yadira (the one with the sharp elbows)
drug companies are the source of all unique writing utensils -Ben Nelson
When life is out of hamburgers, grab a corndog, because, it might not be as good as a hamburger, but, it's food. plus, I have lots of fond memories of corndogs. -chuck ellis
"Marriage is one long apology, interrupted every now and again by kissing"
"you can not form a valid biblical theology out of your
own anecdotal want."
-Mark Rutland
you can upgrade to Windows 95 from Windows ME; you figure that
one out. -parsons
red lights are always bad; except for the power light -josiah lockhart
"everything is a noun if I want it to be" -audra montgomery
"everything worth knowing you can't understand with your mind" -Wood y Allen, Manhattan
if they put a $.02 cent tax on alcohol in athens, they could start their own space program. -John Herndon
the ideal stalker would be an attractive woman -Blake Parrish
"if my body's a wonderland, I'm charging admission" -alex S.
life doesn't make sense, but everything can be explained in a song, and that makes life beautiful. -Justine Spinoza
life, without all the boring parts, smooshed together. that's theater. -John Pierce
Conan speaks to my soul -Thomas Barbian
and anything past midnight is late when you have to work - Dustin Maeno
Marriage is so much more than just "I love you" -roxane griner
"anyone can sing country. especially if you're from south georgia" -katie lumpkin
"God does not define us by our weaknesses" -wade mumm
I'm a nice person to work for, any anyone who says otherwise - is fired. -Mark Rutland
How ugly can free be? -click & clack
I should dj for the world -Katie Hildebrandt
You don't want a digital "ouuugah" horn -Dave Letterman
All of us need adult supervision, and usually that comes from a woman who lives with you -Garrison Keillor
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Also, check out Chris Hall's quotes
last quote added on 7-9-11